Chronicle of a ‘Fresher’

Fadwa Shagroun

‘It’s the week of sept 28th, you’re ridiculously excited for a new chapter that you’ve been desperately waiting for. And even though it’s not going the way you pictured, you’re still forming the high expectations you’ve always had. And just as it’s second week and work load starts to get heavy, brain talks to you. “panic.” it says, and first thing you think of is why? “what, why no I won’t”. “Panic, panic panic...” “ I won’t.” and all of a sudden your heartbeat reaches the roof, everything is silent, your ears hear nothing but the lub dubs. Your chest gets heavy like someone filled them with liquid mercury, and you strive to get air as you’re struggling to breathe. Few minutes later, your heartbeat slows down very slowly. The room stops spinning and you finally feel fine, like god gave you a second chance just as you were about to die.’

Freshers week at UCL main quad (2016)

Now that wasn’t by no means a fictional story, sadly it’s what many students-myself included- experience during first few weeks of uni. Unfortunately school doesn’t teach us how to deal with the anxiety when we’re shoved to the first step of adult life.The change is big. VERY. But while we’re in the moment of trying to adjust and simply survive simply, our minds are too clogged up to think clearly of the most viable solutions to approach what we’re going through.

Hear me out, imagine you’re running in a race track at your max speed, soon enough you will feel out of breath. But you can’t stop, you’re too focused on winning the race to even pause for a second. Everyone else around you is just too good. You will reach a point where you can’t carry on anymore, and you’ll collapse. Now think of the same situation but only this time you slowed down a bit every now and then to take a deep breath, you’re more likely to finish the race than before.

Now this situation is you starting out uni, you have work to finish up, you’re constantly panicking but you don’t think much of it and carry to do work. Your mental health will keep degrading, and there will come a time where you’ll eventually emotionally breakdown. Similarly, you have to slow down to take deep breaths,. Click pause. Take a deep breath, give yourself a damn break. Yes, you can do that while still staying at top of work. Major spoiler, you don’t have to finish everything at once. Whenever you feel like you’re drowning in work, have a look at your to do list and ask yourself, what do I have to finish today? Which is the most important and which is the least, and see what you can push to the next day. By setting short term goals, you ‘ll still get things done, in the best quality ever. Your mind is clear and you can efficiently finish up everything in even way less time than when you are stressed. Perhaps have walk, watch an episode (or season) of your favourite show, create something artistic, literally do ANYTHING that makes YOU happy.

Many people like you are going through the same experience so know you’re not alone. You can never know how that confident kid in your class is feeling, or the quiet kid who barely says a word. It is important to talk about it to someone, whether that be teachers, friends or family. Acknowledge the problem, rather than dismissing its existence. If you’re still reading this, then I’m asking you please take care of yourself. You are supported. It will get better, it always does. It takes time to adjust but eventually you’ll get there. I’m rooting for you.

Disclaimer: All posts do not necessarily reflect the views of UCL Arab and North African society and/or UCL. This is a platform for society members to share their own views.

Image sources: https://www.ucl.ac.uk/news/sites/news/files/1-newtoucl-quad.jpg